Retarded Ideas Welcome (in General)

Barron [CB2BANK Investors Club] September 6 2005 1:23 PM EDT

This is a thread of retarded ideas. Put your retarded ideas regarding CB2 here, and fear not getting flamed--because it is already a self-proclaimed retarded idea.

My retarded idea to start things off: All DD spells, not just Fireball, will cause backlash damage to friendly minions in melee. Ouch! Did I say that? What good is this retarded idea? It would encourage greater use of melee weapons in melee rounds. Why is that good? Who knows. It's just a retarded idea.

QBBarzooMonkey September 6 2005 1:34 PM EDT

Newcomers should be given such an advantage that they can fly into the upper echelon in less than a month. Oh, wait - that one was done already...
Camping should be eliminated. Oh, wait - that one was done too...
USD use in CB2 should be declared evil, and anyone who has never used it should carry on with a holier-than-thou attitude. Shoot, that one too...
Sorry, I can't think of anything new :)

(assuming that the sarcastic thread title is an invitation for sarcasm)

maulaxe September 6 2005 1:37 PM EDT

we should be able to wear a tat on each minion, but they only level 1/n times as fast, where n is the number of tats on the team. Max tat level is also divided by n.

[T]Vestax September 6 2005 1:37 PM EDT

Even better we eliminate DD all together. Yeah all tanks, walls, and enchanters all the time. Then add gear and weapons that actually start doing things like a weapon that tosses a DD like bolts when they swipe. Then we'll make this game so random it's going to brake your brain. :P

Caedmon [Revenge of the Forgers] September 6 2005 3:43 PM EDT

Everyone should have really strong opinions, and post them constantly, and get really upset when people disagree with them, like CB is a really, really important part of western civilization, and lives depend on it...

(note to Jonathan -- in reality, CB only deserves one 'really'. :))

Barron [CB2BANK Investors Club] September 6 2005 4:06 PM EDT

By the way, you can post as many retarded ideas as you want, as long as they're really stupid. Oh, and I came up with another one:

We should have HALF a change month every month, instead of a full change month every other month. This way, we can enjoy changes every month and not have to wait so long. Huh? What was that?

NSFY September 6 2005 4:20 PM EDT

I should be named the CB Ombudsman, serving as the go-between for chat ops and disgruntled kicked and killed people. This new position should also include a special hat and rainbow flashing font for my nick.

Oh geez nice spellchecker Jonathan!

I was Dignifried Bean September 6 2005 4:35 PM EDT

1. We should allow restarts for the 'NUB'aphobes. Why can't re-incarnation be a strategy.
2. We should all gang up and flame Jon whenever he tries to improve the game and/or we should all threaten to quit every 60 days.
3. We should contribute to this thread.
4. We should have mageswords that take precedence over spells in melee.
5. We should have a ranged-only spell.
6. We should spend BA on random draws for rares.
7. We should change "retarded" to "informationally challenged" so as not to offend any retarded people.

Grim Reaper September 6 2005 4:41 PM EDT

1:change name to tattoo blender
2:NUB should be longer
3:we really need tournaments
4:NUB should instead be New character bonus or NCB
5:Make killing other players allows us to take their money-That one has been aroun in like every other multiplayer turn based empire game lol.
6:A new tattoo that makes all minions on team double their dmg
7:1handed weapons can have shields equipped too and allows blocking which means barely any dmg taken or none at all. This chance to block would depend on how much dex is spent or maybe the + on the shield be the chance to block.

QBBarzooMonkey September 6 2005 4:50 PM EDT

Here's skill: Vampirism! It would combine GS, Haste, VA, UC, Evasion, BL, so you wouldn't need weapons, or even armor, because you're already dead and there are no wooden stakes in CB2! You'd only be able to play at night, server time, though...

Or how about this skill: Demigod. Basically, you're all powerful and invincible, but it requires 100,000,000,000 XP to train. You'd have no need for money, armor, or weapons! And you couldn't buy it with USD!

This is fun! :)

Special J September 6 2005 4:52 PM EDT

We should take the ideas from two month players who think they know everything about CB and put them into action.

We should be able to fine people who take Carnage from Carnage Blender and replace it with something else which the poster thinks is witty, which is is actualy informationally challenged.

The NUB should be removed and CB should have rounds that restart every N weeks, at which time changes would go into place to edit the play of the game.

Wait, that is like used it ALL other online games " LOL " (trying to fit in, laughing at stuff that doesn't seem funny in the first place).

Admin{CB1}Slayer333 [SHIELD] September 6 2005 4:56 PM EDT

I know! Lets invite Crackmonkey back, and make him a full admin!

Special J September 6 2005 5:10 PM EDT

While we are inviting people back,

Let's invite Monty back and make him the financial minister.

Barron [CB2BANK Investors Club] September 6 2005 5:15 PM EDT

This is a big, stupid retarded idea:

In addition to the NUB, we also have a TUP, ot Top User Penalty. The top 10 players have an experience/rewards penalty so as to allow new users to catch up to them with the NUB. Aint that stupid?

Grim Reaper September 6 2005 5:17 PM EDT

yea but they already have to fight down.

Karmic Mishap [Soup Ream] September 6 2005 5:28 PM EDT

Here's one: TOA shouldn't add DX. It should just give lots and of lots of pth and evasion, after the way Evasion used to stack gets changed back. Informationally challenged, indeed!

I was Dignifried Bean September 6 2005 5:43 PM EDT

I guess this belongs here, I am copying it from elsewhere.

I said...
I keep dwelling on the word "reluctantly" in Jons original post. What would happen if a user was only allowed to buy one rare (from the store) per ## hours. This would:
1. allow limited camping
2. make storebots less attractive
3. spread the wealth.

And then he said...
there you go Tyr 1 rare item a day ..make them become particular about what they grab and make them think twice at buying a pair of dirty underwear..with like 100 BA for the store separated from the regular BA..just another retarded suggestion ,there are so many no one will notice this one either

I would have corrected myself to say one rare *sighting* per ##, and if you don't take it you lose, but that is probably even more informationally challenged

I never camped, I never will, I will shut-up now ;(

Xiaz on Hiatus September 6 2005 10:37 PM EDT

Can we get automobiles on CB?

We'd need a fuel station to fill it up to run it. Possible a tutorial to teach us how to drive it.

Then give us skills to use with the car, I mean, like ram, burnout, powerslide. Each would do some damage and as well as remove ST/DX etc from the enemy.

We can upgrade it at the mechanic, or even DIY via the home garage.

Wow, well thought out idea :) - O yeh, our minions can ride in it for added AC, HP, DX, ST.

Banei September 6 2005 10:51 PM EDT

Stupid Idea: There's a chance the minion trips and falls if dex is too low. It loses a round of attack, but cannot be hit by bows, xbows and fireballs.

flamewind September 6 2005 11:10 PM EDT

If there's a NUB, why not have a VET? Versed Expert Tip, where anyone who's been here for 5 months+ and who aren't in the top 10 get triple rewards!!

Starseed^Lure September 6 2005 11:13 PM EDT

I'm a retard, but what if
The vorpal blade, instead of its current effect, did magic damage instead of physical?
There were token items to denote prestige for certain things?

Barron [CB2BANK Investors Club] September 6 2005 11:18 PM EDT

This is a really retarded idea. How about instead of trying to win every battle experience and rewards are based on losing a battle. The more you lose the more experience you get. The only catch is, every minion has to either wield a weapon or cast a dd spell. Damn! That would actually be FUN :)

Undertow September 7 2005 12:39 AM EDT

How about we complain ALL THE TIME.

In should be a requirement that half the threads in "current threads" be complaint posts, or Jon randomly bans half the users.

(CB1)logan666 [Jago] September 7 2005 3:19 AM EDT

Increase the NUB!!

Barron [CB2BANK Investors Club] September 7 2005 8:24 AM EDT

Another intelligently challenged and truly retarded idea:
We just use USD in this game for rewards, auctions, sales etc. This way we don't have to be making the conversion from cb2 to usd all the time. Win a fight and your rewards are 5 cents usd, or whatever, and so on. Err, my brain is hurting.

Starseed^Lure September 7 2005 1:30 PM EDT

How about if jon turns over control of the game to its players!

A game for the people, by the people! Down with the Jonocracy!

Barron [CB2BANK Investors Club] September 7 2005 1:35 PM EDT

Another idea is that every idea should be considered retarded unless proven otherwise. This way the person that thunk it up could only be accused of coming up with a retarded idea. If it somehow gets implemented, then it is automatically disqualified as a retarded idea. It then becomes a brilliant idea.

LumpBot September 7 2005 1:35 PM EDT

I think we should get horses that allow us to enter melee 1 round early.
I think we should have "A Party Hat AC 10, cannot be upgraded" that allow you to do a victory dance after you win.
Jonathan should have a CB get together where we all come to argue CB for 24 hours, of course, he'd be behind bullet proof glass with a Nixon mask so we don't know what he looks like.

AdminQBnovice [Cult of the Valaraukar] September 7 2005 1:41 PM EDT

Nixon mask? I'm thinking an authentic Karl Rove "Calvinist Knights of America" battle suit, complete with flame retardant drawers...

{CB3}-HR22 September 7 2005 4:14 PM EDT

My Suggestions

1.) Bank System-
I know many have different ideas about the Bank. Now i am one of the people who are against it....but if it were to come back i think this is a decent setup for it:
*As well as being able to deposit money and earn interest, make an option to take out a Loan from either Central Bank, or a solo provider.
*Have features that automatically add interest and show debts or payments
*Insert your Ideas Here.

2.) New Character Bonus
This is a really great idea that many people have brought up. Here are my thoughts:
*This Bonus could be aquired by anyone who starts a new character, e it a newbie or a vetern.
*The NCB would help you catch back up if you wanted to restart.
*You could also have a NUB and a NCB, which the NUB would be somewhat smaller which the NCB would fill back in. Having the Both would be no advantage, to another NUB user, but the NCB would help out a player without a NUB to stay with the competion.
*The NCB would be a shorter bonus and not as much but would definatly help out with everyone with new ideas for a strat.

Barron [CB2BANK Investors Club] September 7 2005 4:28 PM EDT

HellRazor, those are really retarded ideas. Good work!

New retarded idea: We should have a side game where you start off with a character with 500,000 MPR. As you gain experience the MPR decreases. The first one to reach 0 MPR wins the first round. The final round is won by the first character to reach 500,000 MPR again. The winner gets all the money in Central Bank. Wow! What a half-baked retarded stupid idea. I feel proud.

QBBarzooMonkey September 7 2005 4:36 PM EDT

That would be Cricket Blender! (Oops - don't tell mrwuss I replaced the word "Carnage") :)

AdminQBVerifex September 7 2005 4:36 PM EDT

Spaceman you pirate! You hijacked my idea, everyone knows Horses are my idea! Also poison. I can't wait to see poison horses or whatever in CB.

Caedmon [Revenge of the Forgers] September 7 2005 4:42 PM EDT

What about acid bolts? They could take away +'s on opponents armor...yikes. That's beyond retarded and into cruel.

QBBarzooMonkey September 7 2005 4:49 PM EDT

Lightsabres and "Force" powers!

Oh. Wrong genre. What stupid suggestion...

Special J September 7 2005 4:54 PM EDT

Adding NCB would result in massive USD sales,

so, add the NCB and remove item/money transfers except within your own characters.

Barron [CB2BANK Investors Club] September 7 2005 4:57 PM EDT

Another retarded idea--I have a million of them.

What about guns, <bazookas>, flame guns, cannons, atomic weapons, biological weapons, chemical weapons, grenades, flack jackets, bullet proof vests, gas masks, hazmat suits, flying saucers, time machines, warp speed, err <cough>....

{CB3}-HR22 September 7 2005 5:00 PM EDT

To add to my retarded suggestions:

1.) The Next supporter item should be a weapon a enchanter can use at round 10 and after. It would not need ST or DX to hit and would mimic the ST and DX of your opponets. Have it be low base (like x30) but have cheap upgrade cost.

2.) Start CB3

QBBarzooMonkey September 7 2005 5:04 PM EDT

Here it is, the greatgrandaddy of all FORS:

Shut down CB2 and migrate everyone back to CB1!!!

Huh? Huh? Whaddo I win? :)

Admin{CB1}Slayer333 [SHIELD] September 7 2005 5:54 PM EDT

You Win...

A carp to the face!

(CB1)logan666 [Jago] September 7 2005 7:31 PM EDT

Too add to BarzooMonkey's suggestion shutdown CB2 have everyone go back to CB1 and keep it closed to new players ;)

(CB1)logan666 [Jago] September 7 2005 7:37 PM EDT

Here's another one. Be able to transfer items from cb2 to cb1. I wonder how much damage my x75 ELB would do?

Barron [CB2BANK Investors Club] September 7 2005 7:40 PM EDT

logan that's so retarded! I wish I thought of that.

Here's one that's extra special retarded. Why is there just a move left button on the train page. What if you want to move right? I want a move right button too!

Banei September 7 2005 9:47 PM EDT

I want spam to pop-up each time you win a fight. That'll really force ya to choose wisely!

maulaxe September 8 2005 3:12 AM EDT

lets make it so that Jon has to provide an explanation to all his actions.

Vaynard [Fees Dirt Cheap] September 8 2005 3:54 AM EDT

With all the Lord of the Rings and Tolkien inspiration you can find in CB, I would personally like some mounts. Fell beasts, Rohan horses, Oliphaunts (excuse the spelling please), and maybe even good old Smaug could be ridden around. Not sure how you'd ride them, or who would get them, since after all you can only have one Smaug, but it'd still be cool (and retarded) to see implemented!

"Minion 1 could not attack since Fell Beast is in flight!"
"Fell Beast ate Minion 1 for 999,999,999 damage!"

sssimmo September 8 2005 3:56 AM EDT

Whats the point, soon Ranger will have 999,999,999 MPB.


Grim Reaper September 8 2005 5:37 AM EDT

we need a dd version of mpb

CoolWater September 8 2005 8:13 AM EDT

Close any other threads.
Only this thread allowed in the forum.

sssimmo September 8 2005 8:15 AM EDT

I second that...

Barron [CB2BANK Investors Club] September 8 2005 9:52 AM EDT

I resemble that remark.

Retarded idea # ...umm...what's after 6? : There should never be a loser in a battle. Just someone that surrenders. ( What's that?)

QBBarzooMonkey September 8 2005 10:03 AM EDT

Let's not stop at PG - let's whitewash everything. Carnage Blender 2 should be "Difference of Opinions Resulting In Heated Discussion 2".
Descriptives like "decapitated" and "smashed" should be replaced with "verbally chastised" and "argued vehemently with". Oh, and no weapons. Weapons are bad :)

Barron [CB2BANK Investors Club] September 8 2005 10:17 AM EDT


After all, where would we be without Ben Franklin's retarded idea of sticking a kite up in a storm and hoping to catch a lightening bolt!

AdminQBnovice [Cult of the Valaraukar] September 8 2005 10:24 AM EDT

I've got it, I was actually serious when I thought this up...but it's preety darn retarded. We NEED mage gloves!

A Lesser Ring of Power +10 : Each + adds 5k to your Caster level VRS. AMF
A Ring of Power +37 : Each + adds 10k to your caster level VRS. AMF
A Greater Ring of Power +100 : Each + adds 25k to your Caster lvl vrs AMF
The One Ring : (there should actually be about 10 of these) Negates AMF cast on you, opponents AMF ends up hitting them.

wee todd did.

Caedmon [Revenge of the Forgers] September 8 2005 1:22 PM EDT

Java script graphics to show the actual battle, in progress.

And monkeys. Lots of monkeys.

Special J September 8 2005 1:32 PM EDT

Franklin was retarded for sticking a kite in the air hoping it got struck by a bolt.

I, however, am glad he was retarded.

I was Dignifried Bean September 8 2005 1:49 PM EDT

The artist formerly known as BarzooMonkey was right! This is fun.
Unlimited minions (and disposable henchmen).
Save and especially *revert to saved* buttons
Fortifications, battlements and houses to absorb damage.

Barron [CB2BANK Investors Club] September 8 2005 2:20 PM EDT

Here's a wopper of a retarded idea:

You shouldn't be able to attack an opponent unless he is within 10% of your PR. The winner steals money and experience from the loser in addition to getting standard rewards--OMG! All the money stays in the game. But, most importantly, the ones who fight and use more BA are making better progress. Now, wouldn't that add some competition to the whole shebang? Come to think of it, that's a totally retarded idea, that's why I like it so much.

Mountain Man September 8 2005 2:24 PM EDT

supporter feature: you are a dipstick and have run out of ammunition, this has been an issue for quite some time and the system has decided to save you any further embarrassment and notify you of your ignorance. Buy some ammo noob!!!
yes, this just happened to me. /me hides face in shame

Starseed^Lure September 8 2005 2:58 PM EDT

How about adding a new item slot. Since I'm sure Jon has meticulously created all items with the intent that there be a reasonable AC ceiling, this slot would contain no ac boosting items.

They would be non-upgradable items with small effects such as 1% boost to a single stat. They could be rings, charms, necklaces or trinkets.

They could be released in such a way as to make some more rare and perhaps limited in quantity. Perhaps for a change month release 5 of them, each boosting a different stat, but make each player decide which item to take as their supporter item. This would make each one more valuable and unique. I feel that this would add a new layer of complexity to the game of trade and group design. Limited quantity items in the future will be highly sought after, and will give players who 'have it all' something to chase after.

QBBarzooMonkey September 8 2005 3:00 PM EDT

Trade with your friends! Collect all 5! 1 in every specially marked box of Carnage Blender Crunch! :)

Myonax September 8 2005 4:52 PM EDT

CB Item Sets!

Barron [CB2BANK Investors Club] September 8 2005 5:11 PM EDT

Retarded idea # whatever:

Instead of having change months the way they are now, instead, every other month one minion from every character gets a random change in stats, skill, spells. This CANNOT be altered, ie. the stats, skill, spells cannot be unlearned, and the player must adapt this new random change to his ever changing strategy to make it work.

Barron [CB2BANK Investors Club] September 9 2005 1:23 PM EDT

I think the Auctioneer should have a buy now price that is the same as the highest bid that was plced for the same base item within the last 2 months.
This thread is closed to new posts. However, you are welcome to reference it from a new thread; link this with the html <a href="/bboard/q-and-a-fetch-msg.tcl?msg_id=001VU0">Retarded Ideas Welcome</a>