Murphy's Laws (in Off-topic)

MURPHY'S LAWS

THE PRIME AXIOM: In any field or endeavor, anything that can go wrong, will.

2. If the possibility exists of several things going wrong, the one that will go wrong is the one that will do the most damage.

3. Everything will go wrong at one time.
3.1 That time is always when you least expect it.

4. If nothing can go wrong, something will.

5. Nothing is as easy as it looks.

6. Everything takes longer than you think.

7. Left to themselves, things always go from bad to worse.

8. Nature always sides with the hidden flaw.

9. Given the most inappropriate time for something to go wrong, that's when it will occur.

10. Mother Nature is a mother.
10.1 The universe is not indifferent to intelligence, it is actively hostile to it.

11. If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.

12. If in any problem you find yourself doing an immense amount of work, the answer can be obtained by simple inspection.

13. Never make anything simple and efficient when a way can be found to make it complex and wonderful.

14. If it doesn't fit, use a bigger hammer.

15. In an instrument or device characterized by a number of plus-or-minus errors, the total error will be the sum of all the errors adding in the same direction.

16. In any given calculation, the fault will never be placed if more than one person is involved.
16.1 In any given discovery, the credit will never be properly placed if more than one person is involved.

17. All warranty and guarantee clauses become invalid upon payment of the final invoice.

18. Murphy's Law: "If there are two or more ways to do something, and one of those ways can result in a catastrophe, then someone will do it."

"If anything can go wrong, it will."
"Yo baby yo baby yo."
-- Eddie Murphy
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Chisolm's First Corollary to Murphy's Second Law:
When things just can't possibly get any worse, they will.
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Murphy's Law of Research:
Enough research will tend to support your theory.
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Murphy's Laws:
(1) If anything can go wrong, it will.
(2) Nothing is as easy as it looks.
(3) Everything takes longer than you think it will.
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Newton's Law of Gravitation:
What goes up must come down. But don't expect it to come down where
you can find it. Murphy's Law applies to Newton's.
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O'Toole's commentary on Murphy's Law:
Murphy was an optimist.
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Silverman's Law:
If Murphy's Law can go wrong, it will.
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If there is a wrong way to do something, then someone will do it.
-- Edward A. Murphy Jr.
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In specifications, Murphy's Law supersedes Ohm's.
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It is true that if your paperboy throws your paper into the bushes for five
straight days it can be explained by Newton's Law of Gravity. But it takes
Murphy's law to explain why it is happening to you.
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There are three schools of magic. One: State a tautology, then ring the
changes on its corollaries; that's philosophy. Two: Record many facts.
Try to find a pattern. Then make a wrong guess at the next fact; that's
science. Three: Be aware that you live in a malevolent Universe controlled
by Murphy's Law, sometimes offset by Brewster's Factor; that's engineering.
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Murphy's Law is recursive. Washing your car to make it rain doesn't work.
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If I traveled to the end of the rainbow
As Dame Fortune did intend,
Murphy would be there to tell me
The pot's at the other end.
-- Bert Whitney

Example: Walgreen's was supposed to have pictures for me by 7am on Thursday morning for the short film I was shooting, which I could only use the actors until noon. Walgreen's did not have the pictures for me until 8:30am. I only effectively got two and half hours of shooting. Thankfully we weren't totally reliant on the old, senseless Walgreen's employee that couldn't figure out how to properly load paper into his picture printer-- we shot again on Friday. Murphy averted... for now.... There's only 13 days left to edit...

Is this supposed to be related to that new movie with Jessica Alba and Dane Cook in it?

that depends on whether or not something went wrong during the filming.....

I think Murphy's Law is an integral part of the movie plot. I dunno, they even quoted it in the trailer. Jessica Alba's playing a really hot chick (durr) who has some extremely bad luck.

You know what went wrong with communism?

Murphy's Law.

It was really a 1 in 10 chance, but... for all the above reasons...

Explains China's recent lead shortage in the making.