Beer and Ice Cream Diet (in Off-topic)

AdminG Beee December 9 2005 8:32 AM EST

As we all know, it takes 1 calorie to heat 1 gram of water 1 degree centigrade. Translated into meaningful terms, this means that if you eat a very cold dessert (generally consisting of water in large part), the natural processes which raise the consumed dessert to body temperature during the digestive cycle literally sucks the calories out of the only available source, your body fat.

For example, a dessert served and eaten at near 0 degrees C (32.2 deg. F) will in a short time be raised to the normal body temperature of 37 degrees C (98.6 deg. F). For each gram of dessert eaten, that process takes approximately 37 calories as stated above. The average dessert portion is 6 oz, or 168 grams. Therefore, by operation of thermodynamic law, 6,216 calories (1 cal./gm/deg. x 37 deg. x 168 gms) are extracted from body fat as the dessert's temperature is normalized. Allowing for the 1,200 latent calories in the dessert, the net calorie loss is approximately 5,000 calories.

Obviously, the more cold dessert you eat,the better off you are and the faster you will lose weight, if that is your goal. This process works equally well when drinking very cold beer in frosted glasses. Each ounce of beer contains 16 latent calories, but extracts 1,036 calories (6,216 cal. per 6 oz. portion) in the temperature normalizing process. Thus the net calorie loss per ounce of beer is 1,020 calories. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to calculate that 12,240 calories (12 oz. x 1,020 cal./oz.) are extracted from the body in the process of drinking a can of beer.

Frozen desserts, e.g., ice cream, are even more beneficial, since it takes 83 cal./gm to melt them (i.e., raise them to 0 deg. C) and an additional 37 cal./gm to further raise them to body temperature. The results here are really remarkable, and it beats running hands down.

Unfortunately, for those who eat pizza as an excuse to drink beer, pizza (loaded with latent calories and served above body temperature) induces an opposite effect. But, thankfully, as the astute reader should have already reasoned, the obvious solution is to drink a lot of beer with pizza and follow up immediately with large bowls of ice cream.We could all be thin if we were to adhere religiously to a pizza, beer, and ice cream diet.

AdminShade December 9 2005 8:55 AM EST

WHOA, this is amusing, i copy pasted this for the forum of friends we have and let them read and laugh about it :)

Mountain Man December 9 2005 8:56 AM EST

You are my hero.

QBJohnnywas December 9 2005 8:56 AM EST

So I could substitute cheesecake fresh from the fridge and lose weight a little slower...?


mmmm cheesecake........

AdminQBGentlemanLoser [{END}] December 9 2005 10:08 AM EST


You and physics are my heros!

Must try this tonight!

QBJohnnywas December 9 2005 10:16 AM EST

Oh dear.

'Good evening and welcome to the Ten O'Clock News. I'm Johnny Wasn't.

A large explosion has been reported in East London tonight. Witnesses claim a un-named male burst following a meal of pizza, beer and ice cream. Body parts were found as far away as Crystal Palace.

And, finally, a kitten saved New York from a tidal wave today...'

AdminQBGentlemanLoser [{END}] December 9 2005 10:29 AM EST

No no no, no pizza. ;)

Just beer then ice cream! :D Unfortunatly, the pub I'm going to tonight serves nice ale, which is of course served at room temperature and not chilled..

I might have to go drink some 'extra cold'!

Maelstrom December 9 2005 11:02 AM EST

I like it! I've got the ice-cold ale, now I'd better get some ice cream ;)

This is going to be the next diet craze. Move over Atkins...

AdminG Beee December 9 2005 11:17 AM EST

w00t ! Done deal.

Permission has been granted from wifey and I'll be looking to partaay with you guys all thru Sat 28th. Easy Jet tickets are booked for the 27th - 29th Jan.

GL / Johnny it's up to you guys now. I seriously hope you know what you've let yourself in for !

On that note folks we now have a CB gathering scheduled for Saturday 28th January. Only Johnny / GL and myself are currently attending and no doubts that's gonna be messy enough, but why not get yourself over to London !

The first beer and ice cream floaties are on me :)

AdminQBGentlemanLoser [{END}] December 9 2005 11:19 AM EST

Hmmm... I suppose your should really down your beer before room temperature has a chance to heat it...

Maelstrom December 9 2005 11:27 AM EST

*sigh* return plane ticket to London is $800 CAD, plus taxes. Don't think I can afford it :(

Someday ;)

AdminQBGentlemanLoser [{END}] December 9 2005 11:30 AM EST

:D Hahahahahaha!!!! If Johnny lives up to past performances, it's gonna be messy! ;)

AdminQBGentlemanLoser [{END}] December 9 2005 11:30 AM EST

Mael, just post yourself here! ;)

Maelstrom December 9 2005 11:34 AM EST

Actually, I think I'll be out of town visiting my brother on those days...

AdminQBGentlemanLoser [{END}] December 9 2005 11:37 AM EST

It's also just over a week from my 30th birthday! (If my folks are throwing a surprise party on the 28th, I'll get 'em to pass the details on to you, but I don't think they are...)

So I'll have extra reason to party! :D

Just don't ask for dancing, I'm not allowed to dance... :(

QBBast [Hidden Agenda] December 9 2005 11:42 AM EST

The video must contain dancing!

AdminQBGentlemanLoser [{END}] December 9 2005 11:43 AM EST

I promised pictures, not video! ;)

And I can assure you there'll be none of me in it! ;)

AdminG Beee December 9 2005 11:44 AM EST

Dancing is for chickens and sleepin's cheatin'. Food is permissible but only in packet format and salt 'n vinegar flavour.

This will start on the morning of the 28th and as long as I make my flight late on Sunday afternoon I don't care when it finishes.

Zoglog[T] [big bucks] December 9 2005 12:08 PM EST

If I've got the money for the train then I'm definately there :D

QBJohnnywas December 9 2005 12:24 PM EST

Somebody mention my name? Just don't mention dancing....

Zoglog[T] [big bucks] December 9 2005 12:26 PM EST

I don't think Shade wants to be connected to who dancing is for although I'm sure he is great at that funky chicken ;P

Undertow December 10 2005 2:30 AM EST

Okay, now, for those of us who read the first post, and who aren't crazy about science, why DOESN'T this hold up?

Maelstrom December 10 2005 2:42 AM EST

Who says it doesn't hold up? ;)

Ignorance is bliss.

Stephen December 10 2005 6:59 AM EST

And just to save your health when you do meet up, the catch is that dietary calories are actually kilocalories. So the 'cancelling' equations are just a factor of a thousand out!

AdminQBGentlemanLoser [{END}] December 10 2005 9:01 AM EST

You just had to go and burst the bubble! ;)

Bootsanator December 10 2005 12:52 PM EST

darn you, conversion factor!

th00p December 15 2005 11:05 PM EST

By eating the ice cream at 0 degrees C, you are making a mistake. The proper way to lose the weight on this ice creamy diet is to eat my creation: Absolute Zero Ice Cream.

Using the same formula (1 calorie/gram/degree x 310 degree x 168 grams), but with a 310 degree change for absolute zero (-273 C) to 37 C, we get a loss of 52 Kilocalories. This loss is the same to the amount of energy needed to lift weights for 15 minutes. So, just think, instead of running to the gym to excercise, you could just as easily eat you ice cream .very. cold All you need is a Cyrogenic Refridgeration Device, complete with a molecule-tight vaccuum and an unlimited supply of Helium-3. Easy!

Victimizer December 15 2005 11:51 PM EST

hmmm... interesting thought but you left something out th00p.
the main thing you forget is an is an iron stomach/throat/mouth that wouldn't be destroyed by your absolute zero ice cream

...workout videos of the future.."Stomachs of Steel: Working out the Absolute Zero way"



maulaxe December 16 2005 1:44 AM EST

The Kelvin diet: you can eat anything that is not out of the refrigerator.
Of course, this requires a walk-in fridge... plus you have to stay in there while eating.

Bootsanator December 16 2005 2:17 AM EST and ice cream.....
actually, i had some beer and ice cream with my Old Chicago calzone at dinner tonight (and the ice cream was on the Big Cookie i shared with my friends) :P wonder how many calories i burned eating that stuff...

Victimizer December 16 2005 10:31 PM EST

well factoring in the "Old Chicago Calzone" you gained a bunch

here is a little math

Calzone + ice-cream + beer= tasty individually, but maybe not all combined...anyways the calzoney goodness and hotness will cancel out the beer/ice-cream and then add some

moral of the story: When in doubt about losing weight by ice cream diet...

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