Would you be my Valentine? (in Off-topic)

AdminQBGentlemanLoser [{END}] February 14 2006 5:16 AM EST

Happy Valentine's Day everyone!

Enjoy it while you're still young, it starts to lose it's charm as you get older. Then you realise it's just a commercial occasion to get you to buy more stuff...

AdminG Beee February 14 2006 5:18 AM EST

It's today !!!!? D'oh !

AdminQBGentlemanLoser [{END}] February 14 2006 5:20 AM EST

Uh oh! Someone's gonna be in trouble! ;) You'll have to pop out in your lunch break! Asda are doing a nice range of 'budget' Valentine cards for 8p!

I went to Lakeside with a mate last night, and it was busy! All those last minute shoppers frantic for gifts!

Stephen February 14 2006 5:24 AM EST

And we all remember what else you can buy from Asda for Valentines, thanks to GL's earlier post.

AdminQBGentlemanLoser [{END}] February 14 2006 5:25 AM EST

That's true! :D I'd forgotten about that! ;)

Stephen February 14 2006 5:27 AM EST

And heaven help you if your partner is shopping at Asda and finds out you bought her an eight pence card!

AdminQBGentlemanLoser [{END}] February 14 2006 5:29 AM EST

Oh yeah! That would be nearly as bad as no card at all...

QBBast [Hidden Agenda] February 14 2006 5:30 AM EST

Is there no hope for the XY imagination, beyond a dreary card?

(No, not if I just get the card!)

Xiaz on Hiatus February 14 2006 5:31 AM EST

If only, 'it's the thought that counts' was indeed true.

QBBast [Hidden Agenda] February 14 2006 5:47 AM EST

Oh, it most definitely is the thought that counts. Which is why the card is so underwhelming, generally. How much thought goes into purchasing an 8-pence card on your lunchbreak?

Doom Lit Sky February 14 2006 5:55 AM EST

Well it was on your mind at lunchbreak, instead of more important things :)

AdminQBGentlemanLoser [{END}] February 14 2006 5:57 AM EST

So tell us Bast, let all us men into the little secret of 'What Women *really* want'! ;)

Or is it like the magic circle? If you tell men, they kick you out and you're no longer allowed to be a woman? o_O

sssimmo February 14 2006 6:01 AM EST

So what your saying is Bast, that its the SIZE of the thought that counts?

QBBast [Hidden Agenda] February 14 2006 6:07 AM EST

GL, the "magic circle" is, in this case, a mental one: If I have to tell you, then it doesn't count! You should know. You (poor thing) can't know unless I tell you. If I have to tell you, it doesn't count!

Repeat ad infinitum.

Xiaz on Hiatus February 14 2006 6:29 AM EST

To add to that.
Man asks woman, "What would you like?"
Woman replies, "nothing much, whatever you get me is enough."
Women hopes man is smart enough to 'read between the lines.'
Smart man thinks, "she wants everything, nothing is enough."
Not-so-smart/Lazy/Last-minute man thinks, "great, I'll get her a card and it'll be all good."
Man is wrong on both counts. :P

IndependenZ February 14 2006 8:32 AM EST

I bought my girlfriend a red shirt with Snoopy (the cartoon character) on it, saying: "Thinking about you all day long!" It's way too big for her, so it's really nice to sleep in. I found it about two weeks ago and thought it would be appropriate. On top of that, I let her pick a nice necklace and a matching set of earrings. Is this the kind of thought you were referring to, Bast? Because it worked like a charm! =D

*is trying to be a good boy*

QBBast [Hidden Agenda] February 14 2006 8:35 AM EST

Very well done, Inde! ;)

PirateKing February 14 2006 8:40 AM EST

Well since the ex and I broke up in December, I don't have to buy anything or do some nutty song and dance for her this year.

Maelstrom February 14 2006 9:22 AM EST

Same with me, PK! I can safely ignore all this commercial Valentine's Day nonsense! :)

Zoglog[T] [big bucks] February 14 2006 9:26 AM EST

Mine has recently moved just far enough away so I can safely escape her wrath :P.
Plus she ended up starting an argument when I asked for her address so I could send her something, talk about ungrateful!

QBBarzooMonkey February 14 2006 9:48 AM EST

Well, 19 Valentine's Days ago, I stumbled upon the secret, and its power is both awesome and terrifying at the same time. Or, at the very least, life-changing :P

PirateKing February 14 2006 9:54 AM EST

What's that, Barzoo? I find that chocolate dipped stawberries are mighty powerful magic myself.

PirateKing February 14 2006 9:58 AM EST

.... and strawberries too.

grrr... I HATE when I misspell things. :(

QBOddBird February 14 2006 9:59 AM EST

yes, but stawberries is such a CUTE word, Pirate!

QBsutekh137 February 14 2006 10:08 AM EST

As Tim Roth said in "Bodies, Rest & Motion":

"I got no one to shop for!"

By the way, Bast, I am loving the logic. In my opinion, communication is the most important part of a relationship. So why must I guess what my significant other wants? Furthermore, why would a certain day on the calendar be any more appropriate for doing the right, thoughtful thing? Isn't it more important to try to be thoughtful of the other person each and every day?

The glaring contradiction I see is the two "dings" men are usually hit for (think Oprah): communicating/listening on the one hand, and being able to divine what a significant other is thinking. I'll meet you halfway... I'll become the greatest communicator/listener in the world, and then my significant other can simply tell me what she wants. Sound fair?

By the way, I am totally fine with this working in both directions. None of what I said is gender-specific. If a significant other ever wants to know what I want, all she has to do is ask. I feel just as "warm and fuzzy" if someone gets me something out of the blue or if they get something I asked for. Either way, the other person had to be paying enough attention and then go to the trouble of procuring the stated item/sentiment.

Happy Valentine's Day, GL! Be Mine?

AdminQBGentlemanLoser [{END}] February 14 2006 10:36 AM EST

:D I accept! (But damn, that means I sent the Valentine entry to the wrong person...)

So, what do you want Sute? As for me, I like a surprise! ;)

CmdrHawkeye February 14 2006 10:41 AM EST

Why should we wait till valentines to do nice things for your significant other, if you get them something nice on one day it isn't making you a better person than if you didn't at all. Why wait till valentines day, why not do something nice any time you get the oppurtunity. I guarantee, every woman expects her boyfriend to get her something on valentines (or there will be heck to pay.) Some say the best things in life are the ones you didn't expect. So try doing special things on other days too and see what happens, you never know you might find yourself better off then if you had just given a gift on valentines. (also don't get your girlfriend or anyone a card, cards are the most thoughtless gift you can get, they are the cop-out gift.!

QBOddBird February 14 2006 10:45 AM EST

I thought the best things in life were free, not unexpected?

What would you choose? Free twinkie in your hand vs. unexpected twinkie in your hand. =P

It'd make for an awkward handshake with a stranger, that's for sure. ^_^

AdminQBGentlemanLoser [{END}] February 14 2006 10:45 AM EST

To add to what some have already said, a very religous friend of mine said to me when I asked her why she didn't celebrate certain events;

"Why do I need to be told a specific day to show someone I love how I feel about them? I give gifts and presents all year round."

AdminQBGentlemanLoser [{END}] February 14 2006 10:47 AM EST

OB, mostly, presents are free. :) I find I enjoy unexpected presents more than stuff I know I'm going to get.

But my Dad doesn't. He likes to receive things he actually wants. Each to their own! ;)

CmdrHawkeye February 14 2006 10:51 AM EST

I wasn't thinking about twinkies when I wrote that comment....... thank you OB for completely butchering an inspirational idea, at least GL understood what I was getting at......oh well can't win them all.

AdminG Beee February 14 2006 10:51 AM EST

Do what I do.
Be married nearly 15 years and swap text messages when the cupid day comes around. Not as cheap as the 8p ASDA option, but at 10p for a text message it comes close :)

AdminQBGentlemanLoser [{END}] February 14 2006 11:05 AM EST

Or change to 3 mobile and get paid 3p for every text you receive so if your wife sends you one back, it only cost 7p! O_O

Ecomony and romance! ;)

QBBast [Hidden Agenda] February 14 2006 11:10 AM EST

And we're back to ecomony [sic] and obligation. Well played, gents!

Phrede February 14 2006 11:34 AM EST

I bought my G/F a Morgul Hammer - shame she doesnt play :)

Zoglog[T] [big bucks] February 14 2006 11:38 AM EST

Hey, even get her to call you and receive 5p a minute for your love ;) (only on 3, not recommended on dodgy services such as O2 and Orange).

AdminQBGentlemanLoser [{END}] February 14 2006 11:52 AM EST

>_< Economy... That's how you spell it GL... And unlike Johnny, I've not even been drinking!

Isn't it Honour and Obligation Bast? ;)

If we don't know the rules, and can ask for clarification, we might just as well make them up! ;)

AdminShade February 14 2006 11:58 AM EST

happy valentine GL and everybody else :)

QBsutekh137 February 14 2006 12:08 PM EST

Economy and obligation...as opposed to "special day" mind-reading?

Well played, m'lady!

I have a new angle -- effort. We all do seem to agree that effort is important (at least I think we do). So, if it is difficult for me to listen, remember, and procure a nice gift for a significant other, and yet I get that task done, doesn't that mean more than thinking up something (even a good one) off the top of my head and giving that?

For me, listening is what takes more effort. I am actually quite good at "guessing" what the other person might want (yes, I will always call it a guess, just ask Heisenberg). So, I choose the harder path instead of just grabbing a gift that I know she might like but maybe won't quite be what she really wanted. If I really want to make it meaningful, I will ask of my partner something they want to do that I know I don't care for (a certain restaurant, for example), and do that willingly. That REALLY means a lot.

But everything I mention requires communicating, not just assuming I know what will make the other person smile. We have mouths and ears -- why not use them?

QBOddBird February 14 2006 12:12 PM EST

Happy V's Day to everyone! I love you, one and all! (or most.)

PirateKing February 14 2006 12:53 PM EST

I must be the one you hate, Forgebird. :P

QBsutekh137 February 14 2006 1:29 PM EST

He didn't say "hate", just implied "not love." *smile*

AdminQBGentlemanLoser [{END}] February 14 2006 1:38 PM EST

I love you all! How much just depends on how much I've drunk at that moment! ;)

smallpau1 - Go Blues [Lower My Fees] February 14 2006 1:39 PM EST

Well, my Valentine last night was total Bull, i take my girl out to eat give her flowers, candy, Card (that truly shows how i feel about her), then i take her to this place where they have these boots she really wanted, but they dont have her size, so i say well, lets get going and well have them call us when they get the size she needs. But later that night i had homework to do, but i still had to drive her home, and she got all pissed when i said, we shouldve left 2 hours earlier cuz i needed sleep, she took that as me blaming it on her that we didnt leave earlier, so she wants on a break now.... All that led us to a break, after i give her everything on the day we do valentines cuz she works tonight, while she gives me nothing in return but a broken heart...

AdminQBGentlemanLoser [{END}] February 14 2006 1:42 PM EST

That sucks man...

Have a listen to 'Dry your eyes mate' by the Streets.

[CB1]cheez-its February 14 2006 1:44 PM EST

first off hugs to you small you sound like you need it, secondly why are you still with her? She clearly makes u misserable... Thirdly valentines day is not about the gifts (imo) its about commercial power running its course... but honestly you could of wrtoe her a letter and it would of ment the same thing to her.

on a side note me and the girl are having a spleded dinner at her colleges cafe :) and spending the night watching movies... As you see we are far from routine..
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