If you could fight any historical person.. (in Off-topic)

I'm in love with the movie Fight Club and I thought it might be interesting to know who you could fight if you could pick any historical person, dead or alive, and why?

Me? I'd fight John Paul II because it'd be funny to see someone so holy throw down. Or maybe John Lennon because he wrote the beautiful song "Imagine" then basically insulted everyone who liked the song by saying it's really a song that promotes anti-nationalism, anti-religion, and anti-capitalism, and that we can't see it as such because it's a sugar-coated song. Way to ruin your own art. And plus both of them probably wouldn't fight me back, which makes me a wuss, but also makes me a wuss that would have beaten up the Pope and John Lennon.

Well actually fighting sounds like too much work so it would be Buddha and we would probably of kicked each others butts in former life times !

Whatever jerk that invented the taser. Jerk. *goes looking for some Aloe*

The funniest thing about John Lennon was that he actually liked a fight, in fact was pretty handy with his fists.


Me, I'd rather go back in time and teach myself to fight dirtier than I did when I was a kid.

Failing that, a bit of a wrestle with Jennifer Connelly. Mud optional. That would be a good fight.

Slash, I LOVE your picture. XD And Buddha could probably just eat the hits with his body fat until you tired yourself out and collapsed.

And I'd definitely fight Donald Trump's current wife, cause you know she's a gold digger.

i would go duke it out with Gandhi, i don't know why, but thats my pick

I'd want to go toe to toe with the original Luke Skywalker, lightsabers included. I don't care what the movie tried to portray, there's no way he'd beat me in RL as I'm sure he's a wuss...

Now, his dad on the other hand is a completely different matter and I'd fight Chuck Norris before I'd go up against the man in the mask...

I think I would have to pick Jackson Pollock, just because I'd like to meet him... also, he's crazy, and mainly very drunk, so that would make for a tough battle... Then we'd go get drunk together and I'd steal one of his paintings... somehow... with a UHaul or two probably... they are big.

Jim Morrison

Why?

Well anyone as high as he was all his life shouldn't be too difficult to outsmart(as much as he was a musical genius) and knock out :P

John Calvin "father" of Calvinism and Calvinist thought.

"In this view, all people are entirely at the mercy of God, who would be just in
condemning all people for their sins but who has chosen to be merciful to some.
One person is saved while another is condemned, not because of a willingness, a 
faith, or any other virtue in the first person, but because God sovereignly chose to
have mercy on him"

The ideas that he started have turned into the modern xian ideas that irk me so much...

Why, Novice? That type of thinking seems to be very rational as far as faith goes. But then again, I guess rationality defeats the purpose of faith.

It has less to do with what he thought that what his ideas led to. The idea that any deity would chose one person to succeed and prosper while damning another to a life of extreme suffering for completely arbitrary reasons is ugly, and gives way to people thinking that people without success or good fortune were made that way by god. People who thank god for winning a game, or an award, or believe that he's rewarded them with monetary wealth out of some sort of twisted random mercy.
It's a half step from there to the not so old idea that black people were black because of some sin committed by an ancestor. I've certainly attributed more of the stupid ideas floating around today to him than is really fair, but the line of thinking he helped formalize has a lot to do with the folks who think that they have what they have because god loves them, and the people who don't have the same things are lesser or evil.

People will think like that regardless if Calvin never existed. We see it all the time. When someone wins an award what do they do? They thank God as if God favored them over other people. I think (I say think, even though I'm pretty sure, because I can't prove it) that the most people only pray when they want something, whether it be a material object, someone to heal, forgiveness, etc. I'm an atheist so I might not be the most knowledgeable when it comes to the topic of religion, but favoritism seems to be the only solution that make sense. I mean, why else would some good and moral people suffer while a person who might be cruel and evil might live an easy and successful life? Why are some people born with everything they could ever want and others starve to death before they are even old enough to fathom morality? Those are just my thoughts, I'm not trying to attack you or your beliefs or anything.

I think I would like to beat Adolf Hitler senseless.

bah too easy Glory, though I almost picked him just so I could bring up little nicky...

While you may be right about people assuming god just likes them better Op, I do think the idea that god plays einey miney moe with regards to what lives we lead has it's roots in Calvinism.

Monty

I'd definitely add Carlos Mencia to the list. Never before have I seen such an unfunny bigot get so much credit for being an open-minded comedian.

/me high fives the tasty frozen treat for the Carlos Mencia beat down.

I'd like to fight with Mother Teresa or Lady Di.
If they wernt available then Bambi would have to be my choice.

The fat Star Wars kid twice over and recorded in HD.

What fat Star Wars kid?

I'd fight Jesus. Only we'd battle it out via paper/rock/scissors and staring contests. Best 3 out of 5.. I think I can take him.

Ronald Reagan. I hate how everyone pretends he was a great president while copying his terrible ideas. That and the fact that he was an actor/president. Talk about two jobs that just shouldn't go together.

Ever seen the video of the fat kid flailing around with a two headed light saber? Google it. You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll watch it so many times he'll die.

Achilles, =P

i know his weak spot, lol

I would fight ME!

Obviously I couldn't beat me but the close battle would instill some much needed humility and thus my coworkers would stop describing me with 4 letter words.

Oh and this would finally determine whether or not aging is making me smarter or dumber!

Shakespeare - for ruining what little fun I used to have at school.

Todd-Spydah

He would bow before my mediocrity!!!!

Bruce Lee.

There are worse ways to die...

And that takes me right back to Jennifer Connelly.


Sorry, it is Spring.

Cherie Blair

That's definitely one smile you'd like to wipe off someone's face :P

Love is in the air as the rare JW-bird tries desperately to find a mate =P

Unfortunately he got stuck with Bill Oddie ;P

I could take Ryan Seacrest.

I wonder how many members got the Bill Oddie joke Zoglog - I did :)

He's not a historical man, but I would really love to beat the crap out of my boss right now. ^_^

Stephen Hawking.

Thats right,

Let us beat up a guy with ALS confined to a wheelchair.

"Let us beat up a guy with ALS confined to a wheelchair."

Let us beat up a *really smart guy* with ALS confined to a wheelchair. :D

I don't know who I'd fight. I'm so horridly weak, even some five-year-old from the Renaissance times could probably beat me. I'd probably pick somebody like Genghis Khan, just to see what somebody like that was like. :D Maybe some famous ancient Egyptian that nobody knows about who found out something really important. Or Galileo. *shrug*

Well, if you're fighting someone in a wheel chair, you probably won't lose.

I propose that I hijack this thread and change it to ...If you could PIE any historical person.. now who ??

That makes the 'Hitler' response less lame. It would have made a perfect ending to one of those speech/rants he used to give!

I feel history is a pretty darn beautiful thing. Even bad history. I see any major change in history as a pretty change. Wow, to be able, as lowly humans, to change to course of a powerfull thing as history! Simply astonishing. Time melded by the aspirations
of us, imperfect beings....

So, If I had to fight anyone responsible for a major change, I'd fight the first person who had the idea of creating an idea which would modify the lives of milions of people, and modify their very way of living, the person who invented religion!

I would probably not, once I did beat him (or her, IF i did) change the invention that is religion. No, it is needed as a way for humanity to evolve, be it in a good or bad way. I'd just be curious to see if I could beat the guy of gal, to see If I could have that big an impact on mankind.

Ashilizator, you're taking it a little too literally, no? I'm asking who you'd like to fight if you could fight anyone for fun. I'm not talking about the historical and societal ramifications and consequences resulting from fighting said person . And I don't think one single person invented the concept of religion. :\

Ya religion is a common delusion brought on by a need to control the uncontrollable .

"Reality is the original Rorschach" - Discordianism.

But, to answer the question... Joan of Arc.

Bah, there must be ONE person who thought of it first...anyway, it was more of a figure of speech. Maybe I would have to fight lots of people.

In SNK4R's defense, lowly man that he is, I would fight the tag man.

Yes, he who decided to put tags into the backs of shirts, there to itch, scratch, and annoy...I would fight him.

Do you cut off your shirt tags? XD I do.