I like monkeys. (in Off-topic)

AdminTal Destra September 12 2011 1:53 PM EDT

I like monkeys.

The pet store was selling them for five cents a piece. I thought that

odd since they were normally a couple thousand each. I decided not to

look a gift horse in the mouth. I bought 200. I like monkeys.

I took my 200 monkeys home. I have a big car. I let one drive. His

name was Sigmund. He was retarded. In fact, none of them were really

bright. They kept punching themselves in their genitals. I laughed.

Then they punched my genitals. I stopped laughing.

I herded them into my room. They didn't adapt very well to their new

environment. They would screech, hurl themselves off of the couch at

high speeds and slam into the wall. Although humorous at first, the

spectacle lost its novelty halfway into its third hour.

Two hours later I found out why all the monkeys were so inexpensive:

they all died. No apparent reason. They all just sorta' dropped dead.

Kinda' like when you buy a goldfish and it dies five hours later. Damn

cheap monkeys.

QBRanger September 12 2011 1:58 PM EDT


Seriously? Have you not heard of the PC police?

Fishead September 12 2011 2:04 PM EDT

Admit it, they died because you were spanking them too much.

AdminTal Destra September 12 2011 2:41 PM EDT

Dude, ranger... all i did was c&p something i thought was funny and might brighten up someones day... go away

Quyen September 12 2011 2:50 PM EDT

should've sold em for 10 cents each =.=

Lord Bob September 12 2011 4:48 PM EDT

I didn't have a problem with it. You get the Lord Bob Seal of Approval!

A Lesser AR of 15 [Red Permanent Assurance] September 13 2011 1:30 AM EDT

This thread is closed to new posts. However, you are welcome to reference it from a new thread; link this with the html <a href="/bboard/q-and-a-fetch-msg.tcl?msg_id=003DhS">I like monkeys.</a>