It's been Year already...... (in Off-topic)


Zenai May 28 2010 8:28 AM EDT

Today it has been Year since the passing of my mother.

http://www.carnageblender.com/bboard/q-and-a-fetch-msg.tcl?msg_id=002mMk

It is still difficult for me. I was wondering why I couldn't get to sleep on time last night. I Just kept finding things to do until I was exhausted. I can't believe it but I awoke early this morning at the very time it was said she passed. Come to think of it it happened last year too. I thought I had forgotten that.....I thought I was through with that part of the pain. It's like it is fresh all over again. What's worse is I have to work today and smile at ppl and act like everything is ok. Man this is tough......

QBJohnnywas May 28 2010 8:36 AM EDT

I lost mine the year before last. It's different for everybody, but what I've found is that it gets easier (not less just easier) to deal with once the first few significant dates pass - first Christmas, first birthday, first anniversary and so on. Those were the landmarks where it felt fresher.

Going through the second Christmas without her was much less upsetting because I'd gone through it once already.

It's only a year, don't put yourself down for feeling bad. Go with it and try to think of better times.

Zenai May 28 2010 2:20 PM EDT

Yeah I see where you are coming from JW. Still though even with all of the things I have going on I should not have forgotten the date. Out of everything I think that is what hurts the most and what I am bashing myself the most about.

TheShazbot May 28 2010 2:59 PM EDT

I lost my dad in 2005, and my grandmother in 2007. I know how it feels. While it does hurt, plow through it, because they'll always have good memories of you.

Admindudemus [jabberwocky] May 28 2010 3:12 PM EDT

how many times have you thought of her during that year though?

Zenai May 28 2010 4:57 PM EDT

Honestly quite a bit, but since Easter not much if at all. Life has bombarded the hell out of me as of late. Still though I feel it is not an excuse to forget.

kevlar May 29 2010 2:11 AM EDT

you're a good man, Z. I remmber talking about this with you last year and it weighs just as heavy thinking about it now.

AdminShade May 29 2010 4:33 AM EDT

Zenai: the thing is, even if you are afraid you will forget, you won't.
It has been a bit over 11 years since I lost my nephew, he was just 18 when he died of skin cancer.

I'll never forget him even when I sometimes still worry about forgetting him... it's like being taught how to ride a bike, you'll never unlearn :)

Take care though, you'll be fine :)

Seran [Hidden Agenda] May 29 2010 4:56 AM EDT

Lost a relative a year ago, while I was out doing things other than playing CB...so I know the feeling.

Hang tough.
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