Best Quotes (in Contests)

{WW]Nayab [Cult of the Valaraukar] April 24 2011 3:44 AM EDT

I'm running a contest for the best quotes..
Ill be the judge for each entry.
Really, any quote is acceptable. If you can, tell me the name of the person who said it and the game/show/occupation that they said it in.
Prizes will likely be money. I will run this for at least a week, maybe until the end of May if i feel like it.

IPoop April 24 2011 8:14 AM EDT

funniest one ive seen in the last few weeks

'Im saddened by the fact the Australian government would allow these threats against me, but Im not really surprised given that these are the same people who stood side by side with Nazi Germany in the Second World War. they are unfairly politicizing this situaiton and if they want to threaten me with frivolous litigation then I will simply refuse to dignify their nation with a visit. In fact I refuse to visit Europe until I receive an apology from Mr. Stary in which he admits I am in no way to blame for trying to incite acts of violence against his client. I mean, this is just ridiculous'.

Sarah Palins comments after it came she could face trial in Australia

{WW]Nayab [Cult of the Valaraukar] April 24 2011 8:34 AM EDT

Thats awesome. As an Australian citizen, i give you money for bringing attention to the idiocy of Sarah Palin!
{WW]Nayab (Alara United) BetOnIt (There Can Only Be One) $50000 -- :D 8:34 AM EDT

IPoop April 24 2011 8:41 AM EDT

cheers! Just incase there was a bit more

Perplexed by Palin's proposed plan of action a reporter asked if the Alaskan Governor wasn't perhaps confusing Australia, the Oceanic country, with the European nation of Austria

"Of course not. Don't be ridiculous. You know what I'm talking about...Australia...the one next to Germany"

Palin then concluded her press conference by stating that she harbours no resentment toward Governor Schwarzenneger for his countries attitude and that she was a huge fan of Terminator 2.

QBBast [Hidden Agenda] April 24 2011 9:09 AM EDT

I can't find a substantiation for her response, only Stary's initial commentary. Link?

{WW]Nayab [Cult of the Valaraukar] April 24 2011 7:59 PM EDT


QBPit Spawn [Abyssal Specters] April 24 2011 8:22 PM EDT

"Forgiveness is between them and God. It's my job to arrange the meeting."

Denzel Washington in Man on Fire

Admiralkiller [Cult of the Valaraukar] April 24 2011 9:26 PM EDT

"When the doors of perception are cleansed man will see things as they really are, infinite." William Blake. Later "The Doors" used this quote to help inspire the title of their band.(

"The world is full of infinite possibility's"
Not 100% sure I think it's Albert Einstein.

Admiralkiller [Cult of the Valaraukar] April 24 2011 9:28 PM EDT

"How can you soar with the eagle when you hang out with the turkeys"

Donald Trump

QBPit Spawn [Abyssal Specters] April 24 2011 10:23 PM EDT

"There are three things all wise men fear: the sea in storm, a night with no moon, and the anger of a gentle man." ラ Patrick Rothfuss (The Name of the Wind)

Quyen April 25 2011 7:07 AM EDT

"Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars."
Brian littrell

{WW]Nayab [Cult of the Valaraukar] April 25 2011 8:22 AM EDT

I've been giving out money left right and centre!
The more quotes you post the poorer i will be, so keep them coming!

AdminTal Destra [C and S Forgery Lmtd.] April 25 2011 8:37 AM EDT

"My one great talent lies in making those who wrong me suffer horribly." - Archilochus

"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." Dr. Seuss

"Strength is born in the deep silence of long-suffering hearts; not amid joy." Arthur Helps

Quyen April 25 2011 9:06 AM EDT

Be where you are; otherwise you will miss your life.

- Buddha

Our prime purpose in this life is to help others. And if you can't help them, at least don't hurt them.

- Tenzin Gyatso, 14th Dalai Lama

No matter what age you are, or what your circumstances might be, you are special, and you still have something unique to offer. Your life, because of who you are, has meaning.

- Barbara de Angelis

some uniques :D

AdminTal Destra [C and S Forgery Lmtd.] April 25 2011 9:12 AM EDT

Saint Bernard of Clairvaux who wrote, "L'enfer est plein de bonnes volontes et desirs" (hell is full of good wishes and desires)

in other words:
The road to hell is paved with good intentions

AdminG Beee April 25 2011 9:22 AM EDT

If my critics saw me walking over the river Thames they would say it was because I couldn't swim: Margaret Thatcher.

Admiralkiller [Cult of the Valaraukar] April 25 2011 9:50 AM EDT

"Your best is an idiot"- Bender from Futurama

"You'll be the laughing stock of me!"-Adam West from Family Guy

Zenai [Ministry of Pain] April 25 2011 10:37 AM EDT

Just a few quotes that I have always liked and for the most part have lived by(there are more but this is already a bit

"Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names." John F. Kennedy -35th President of the United States, 1917 -1963

"Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't." Erica Jong -born March 26, 1942 -American author and teacher

"Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it." André Gide -French author and winner of the Nobel Prize -22 November 1869 ヨ19 February 1951

"For fools rush in where angels fear to tread." Alexander Pope -English poet, 1680-1744

"I am patient with stupidity but not with those who are proud of it." Edith Sitwell -British Poet -7 September 1887 ヨ9 December 1964

"I have made this letter longer than usual because I lack the time to make it shorter." Blaise Pascal -French mathematician, physicist, inventor, writer -June 19, 1623 ヨAugust 19, 1662

"Imagination was given to man to compensate him for what he is not, and a sense of humor was provided to console him for what he is." Oscar Wilde -Irish writer and poet -16 October 1854 ヨ30 November 1900

"It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it." Aristotle -384 BC ヨ322 BC -Greek philosopher

Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great." Mark Twain -Samuel Langhorne Clemens (November 30, 1835 ヨApril 21, 1910 -well known by his pen name Mark Twain, -American author

"Success is never found. Failure is never fatal. Courage is the only thing." Winston Churchill -British politician, 1874-1965

"That which doesn't kill us makes us stronger." Friedrich Nietzsche October 15, 1844 ヨAugust 25, 1900 -19th-century German philosopher

"The greatest lesson in life is to know that even fools are right sometimes." Winston Churchill -British politician, 1874-1965

"When you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on." Franklin D. Roosevelt -32nd US President, held office during World War II, 1882 -1945

AdminQBnovice [Cult of the Valaraukar] April 25 2011 11:17 AM EDT

Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity - Hanlon's Razor

Demigod April 25 2011 11:58 AM EDT

Gotta make my mind up. Which seat can I take? ~Rebecca Black

Lochnivar April 25 2011 12:11 PM EDT

"You know, one day something you say is going to get you killed." ~ my brother (directed at me)

Lord Bob April 25 2011 2:56 PM EDT

"Democrats don't want to eliminate capitalism or competition, but they'd like it if some kids didn't have to go to a crummy school in a rotten neighborhood while others get to go to a great school and their Dad gets them into Harvard. Because when that happens "achieving the American dream" is easy for some, and just a fantasy for others." -- Bill Maher

"Conservatives say if you don't give the rich more money, they will lose their incentive to invest. As for the poor, they tell us they've lost all incentive because we've given them too much money." --George Carlin

Admindudemus [jabberwocky] April 25 2011 4:50 PM EDT

the first web page i ever made, probably around 12 years ago, was a page of my favorite quotes at that time. about half are from songs, the others are a mix but many still appeal to me today so without further adieu, here is the page link:

Warchild April 25 2011 7:39 PM EDT

"Noone can belittle you without your permission." --Eleanore Roosevelt

{WW]Nayab [Cult of the Valaraukar] April 25 2011 9:17 PM EDT

{WW]Nayab (Alara United) Warchild (Marvin) $10000 -- Quotes! 9:13 PM EDT
{WW]Nayab (Alara United) Admindudemus (damage control) $10000 -- Quotes! 9:13 PM EDT
{WW]Nayab (Alara United) Lord Bob (Lord Bob) $25000 -- Quotes! 9:10 PM EDT
{WW]Nayab (Alara United) Lochnivar (Anbhas) $10000 -- Quotes! 9:09 PM EDT
{WW]Nayab (Alara United) AdminQBnovice (Construct) $12500 -- Quotes! 9:08 PM EDT
{WW]Nayab (Alara United) Zenai (Z's Item Holder) $135000 -- Quotes! 9:07 PM EDT
{WW]Nayab (Alara United) Admiralkiller (Demon Team) $10000 -- Quotes! 9:05 PM EDT
{WW]Nayab (Alara United) AdminG Beee (BizzyBeee) $20000 -- Quotes! 9:04 PM EDT
{WW]Nayab (Alara United) Quyen (WinFTW) $45000 -- Quotes! 9:03 PM EDT
{WW]Nayab (Alara United) Tal Destra (Chaotic Endeavors) $50000 -- Quotes! 9:02 PM EDT

All the prizes from when i last updated.
Strangely enough, Demigod didn't get any money for the Rebecca quote :P
Dudemus, you would have gotten more, but i could only see the first two quotes on the page. My browser (safari) crashed when i opened the page. twice. Might be best if you post them in here.

Also, im surprised at the lack of quotes from games in here. Apparently Portal 2 has some good ones and i am certain other games have them too.
So, bonus money to the first person to give me a game quote and more money for more quotes!

{WW]Nayab [Cult of the Valaraukar] April 25 2011 9:40 PM EDT

Tal walks away with the bonus, but i still got lots of money to give!

QBBast [Hidden Agenda] April 25 2011 9:40 PM EDT

All your base are belong to us! *Zero Wing

Lord Bob April 25 2011 10:08 PM EDT

Ray: Gozer the Gozerian... good evening. As a duly designated representative of the City, County and State of New York, I order you to cease any and all supernatural activity and return forthwith to your place of origin or to the nearest convenient parallel dimension.

Peter: That oughta do it. Thanks very much, Ray.

Lord Bob April 25 2011 10:15 PM EDT

You wanted game quotes? Here's one of my favorites:

Kain: Listen to me, you must understand that every creature is bound to one predestined path. We are all shackled...

Raziel: To the Wheel of Fate. Believe me, I know that even better than you do.

Kain: All but one. Because of your remaking, you are the one unbound creature, the one amoung us all that truely has free will. You have a choice, Raziel.

Xenogard [Chaotic Serenity] April 25 2011 11:51 PM EDT

"I'll be whatever I wanna do!" - Fry from Futurama

"What is a poet? An unhappy person who conceals profound anguish in his heart but whose lips are so formed that as sighs and cries pass over them they sound like beautiful music." - Soren Kierkegaard

"If you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you." - Friedrich Nietzsche

"There is no greater sorrow, than to be mindful of the happy time in misery." - Dante Alighieri 'The Divine Comedy'

"Nothing gold can stay." - Robert Frost, excerpt from the poem of the same name.

"Sometimes you just have to pee in the sink." - Charles Bukowski

"An intellectual says a simple thing in a hard way. An artist says a hard thing in a simple way." - Charles Bukowski

"All you need is love." - John Lennon, The Beatles

A few of my own creations back when I used to write more often >_>

"If I should wake up tomorrow, I should at least be glad to know that I remember yesterday. Unless, in fact, I can't remember yesterday, in which case I should at least be glad I woke up."

"Lost is a man who see's beauty in everything, and takes pleasure in nothing."

"I color myself blue just to cover up the green, So please don't get painted red over my choice of hues. I'm just too yellow to make it clear, that only with some help does my black disappear."

Those are the only short things I can find that I still really like, most of the stuff I write is pretty lengthy, too lengthy to post in here. But I thought that I'd share some stuff anyway :)

{WW]Nayab [Cult of the Valaraukar] April 26 2011 12:01 AM EDT

{WW]Nayab (Alara United) Xenogard (| Xenogard |) $110000 -- Quotes! 11:59 PM EDT
{WW]Nayab (Alara United) Lord Bob (Lord Bob) $35000 -- Quotes! 11:57 PM EDT
{WW]Nayab (Alara United) QBBast (Dixie Cousins) $7500 -- Quotes! 11:57 PM EDT
{WW]Nayab (Alara United) Tal Destra (Chaotic Endeavors) $35000 -- Quotes! 9:38 PM EDT

All prizes since i last updated. There have been some really good quotes posted and i quite liked some of your own quotes Xeno.
Please continue to post, i still got plenty of money left.

Lord Bob April 26 2011 12:41 AM EDT

Here's one of my own. If you heard it from someone else, they stole it from me.

"Who cares if the glass is half empty or half full? I just know that in a minute, I'm going to need another refill."

Duke April 27 2011 2:15 AM EDT

<Fishead> I'm married. I'm sexless.

QBPit Spawn [Abyssal Specters] April 27 2011 9:08 AM EDT

"When people talk to god its called praying. When god talks to people its called schizophrenia." - Mulder in X-Files

Adminedyit [Superheros] April 27 2011 9:43 AM EDT

1. "Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe."---Albert Einstein

2. "Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth."-- Sherlock Holmes

3. "Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."-- Dr. Seuss

4. "Who discovered we could get milk from cows, and what did he THINK he was doing at the time?"---Billy Connelly.

5. "A drunken man can get used to the site of his dead grandmother climbing up his leg with a knife clenched between her teeth, but this place is too much for any one to handle."---Hunter S. Thompson

6. "There he goes, one of god's own prototypes. Some high-powered freak of the kind never intended for mass production." Hunter S. Thompson

7. "Beer is proof that god loves us and wants us to be happy"---Benjamin Franklin.

8. "It is known that there are an infinite number of worlds, simply because there is an infinite amount of space for them to be in. However, not every one of them is inhabited. Therefore, there must be a finite number of inhabited worlds. Any finite number divided by infinity is as near to nothing as makes no odds, so the average population of all the planets in the Universe can be said to be zero. From this it follows that the population of the whole Universe is also zero, and that any people you may meet from time to time are merely the products of a deranged imagination."
Douglas Adams, HHGTTG

9. "Angels on the sideline, baffled and confused. Father blessed them all with reason. And this is what they choose?"
Maynard, Tool

10. "Mother is the name of god in the hearts and minds of children" unknown

11. "And Caine was so marked by god, to walk the earth in shadows and darkness for all eternity. Imbueing only blood and bitter ashes, and he who so ever slayeth Caine, shall receive punishment sevenfold" Genesis 4:15

12. "I've been called ignorant and apathetic, but I don't know what that means, nor do I care" Ron White

13. "They key to a happy relationship is two little words, Yes Dear" my grandfather

{WW]Nayab [Cult of the Valaraukar] April 28 2011 5:30 PM EDT

{WW]Nayab (Alara United) Adminedyit (Velya) $155000 -- Quotes! 5:27 PM EDT
{WW]Nayab (Alara United) QBPit Spawn (Triumvirate) $17500 -- Quotes! 5:25 PM EDT

Be aware edy, you got no money for #3 as it was said above by Tal.
Also, i am still waiting for Dudemus to post some of the quotes from his favourite quote page so i can give him money.
Now, it appears i have spelt too many words wrong for your American spellchecker.
Should work now.

QBRanger April 28 2011 5:40 PM EDT

Shaggy: This is tied for scariest day of my life!
Velma: Tied with what?
Shaggy: Every other freaking day of my life!

Shaggy: We're gonna die!
Daphne: Think positively!
Shaggy: We're gonna die quickly!

Both from Scooby-Doo 2: Monster's Unleashed

{WW]Nayab [Cult of the Valaraukar] April 29 2011 2:33 AM EDT

{WW]Nayab (Alara United) QBRanger (The Funkes) $75000 -- Quotes! 2:27 AM EDT

Gotta love Scooby-Doo. Thanks for that Ranger, needed some funny quotes.
If this contest reaches a time where no one has posted in the last 48hours, ill run a follow up contest.
Wish spellchecker was less annoying. This marks my 8th attempt to post this reply.

AdminTal Destra [C and S Forgery Lmtd.] April 29 2011 8:22 AM EDT

"Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss." - Douglas Adams

Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils ... - Louis Hector Berlioz

I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. - Henny Youngman

"Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway." - Joey Adams

Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.

Quyen April 29 2011 8:37 AM EDT

a nice one i thought of xD

"Stay the same, as long as possible. whenever you change, it isnt your life anymore." :D

some game quotes:
assassin's creed
Altair: "Give me names, ill give you blood."

Chrono trigger (my favorite rpg game :O )
Magus: "If history is to change, let it change. If the world is to be destroyed, so be it. If my fate is to die, I must simply laugh."

Magus: "Before him, all are as leaves cast to the bitter winds that howl about Death's black wings." (Magus have the best quotes :D)

and some series quotes :D
(currently best quote from all)
"I don't care who I have to fight!
If he rips my arms out, I'll kick him to death!
If he rips my legs off, I'll bite him to death!
If he rips my head off, I'll stare him to death!
And if he gouges out my eyes, I'll curse him from the grave!
Even If i'm torn to shreds, I'm taking Sasuke back from Orochimaru!"

"On that day, you taught me that solitude is painful! I understand that so well right now. I have family, and I have friends but if you're gone... To me... It will be the same as being alone."

hope this fills you with hope, hatred, love or sadness :O

Lochnivar April 29 2011 11:32 AM EDT

モNobody ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public.ヤ

Henry Louis Mencken

Quyen April 29 2011 12:37 PM EDT

"If Black means hell, and White means Heaven, what happens when a white person commits a crime, whilst a dark person tried to prevent that?"

just thought of when i heard someone talking about racism :O

Lord Bob April 29 2011 6:01 PM EDT

Kay: A person is smart. People are dumb, panicky dangerous animals and you know it. Fifteen hundred years ago everybody knew the Earth was the center of the universe. Five hundred years ago, everybody knew the Earth was flat, and fifteen minutes ago, you knew that humans were alone on this planet. Imagine what you'll know tomorrow.

IPoop April 29 2011 6:26 PM EDT

have to say i like this quote as it reminds me of monty python and the holy grail (nope not old enough to see it first time round) so will split my previous winnings with Que

"I don't care who I have to fight!
If he rips my arms out, I'll kick him to death!
If he rips my legs off, I'll bite him to death!
If he rips my head off, I'll stare him to death!
And if he gouges out my eyes, I'll curse him from the grave!
Even If i'm torn to shreds, I'm taking Sasuke back from Orochimaru!"'''

... its missing the always look on the bright side song though

but the one quote i try to remember (which ive shortened) is ....


its the average number of days a person lives ... 28,000 days really puts it in perspective for me in the scale of things. it covers masses of quotes with that number and yet covers nothing when i think of it broken down to pure luck and averageness

IPoop April 29 2011 6:32 PM EDT

i don't think averageness comes coles to elevenes though ... viva le hobbits lol

(and Quyen got $25k for his quote from me)

(*loved reading all the quotes and awesome idea for a contest Nayab will send you 25k to lol... just wish i wasnt so tight)

hmmm hobits with one or with two b's isn't recognised

{WW]Nayab [Cult of the Valaraukar] April 29 2011 8:05 PM EDT

{WW]Nayab (Alara United) BetOnIt (There Can Only Be One) $10000 -- Quotes! 8:02 PM EDT
{WW]Nayab (Alara United) Lord Bob (Lord Bob) $17500 -- Quotes! 8:01 PM EDT
{WW]Nayab (Alara United) Lochnivar (Anbhas) $10000 -- Quotes! 8:01 PM EDT
{WW]Nayab (Alara United) Quyen (Quyen) $100000 -- Quotes! 8:00 PM EDT
{WW]Nayab (Alara United) Tal Destra (Chaotic Endeavors) $75000 -- Quotes! 7:59 PM EDT

Well Quyen certainly came out ahead on this update.
Glad you liked the contest Bet.
And as i said before, there will be a follow up contest for this should this one ever finish.

IPoop April 30 2011 2:14 AM EDT

love the whole quotes thing .. one to be added

dont go online when drunk - me (way to often when drunk)

Quyen April 30 2011 2:33 AM EDT

i saw some nice quotes, which made you think so much :D as i like to think about such quotes, i do like this contest so much ;)

and to finish it xD

"love must be a sickness, since so much people get hurt by love, the only cure, is to find the one who will life on with you, as it wouldn't be love anymore, but slavery."

I lol'ed when i thought of this one xD

Drakon(DS) [Guardian Bros Inc] April 30 2011 4:26 AM EDT

"Nobody like you, everyone hates you, your gonna lose. Smile you f***." Bruce Willis in The Last Boy Scout i think i got it right been awhile

{WW]Nayab [Cult of the Valaraukar] May 1 2011 12:28 AM EDT

Nayab (Alara United) Drakon(DS) (Fem Fatales) $15000 -- Quotes! 12:26 AM EDT
Nayab (Alara United) Quyen (Quyen) $20000 -- Quotes! 12:25 AM EDT

Prizes prizes everywhere

Xenogard [Chaotic Serenity] May 1 2011 1:03 AM EDT

"There is no Peter, only zuul." - Peter Griffin

"I know kung fu." - Neo, The Matrix

"These snozberries taste like snozberries." - Kid from super troopers

"If you want to view paradise, simply look around and view it." - Willy Wonka

"So much time and so little to do. Wait a minute. Strike that. Reverse it." - Willy Wonka

"Did you hear that Meg? Guys can marry other guys now. So...this is awkward, but I mean, if they can do that, that is pretty much it for you, isn't it? I mean you as well pack it in. Game over." - Stewie, Family Guy

And now for classic Batman and Robin quotes:

Robin: "Holy molars! Am I ever glad I take good care of my teeth!"
Batman: "True. You owe your life to dental hygiene."

Robin: "Where'd you get a live fish, Batman?"
Batman: "The true crimefighter always carries everything he needs in his utility belt, Robin."

Batman: "Go back outside and calm the flower children."
Robin: "They'll mob me!"
Batman: "Groovy."

Robin: "If we close our eyes, we can't see anything."
Batman: "A sound observation, Robin."

Robin, about Catwoman: "Do you think she'll kill Batgirl?"
Batman: "Or worse, Robin. Or worse."

Batman (about to cross the street): "Remember Robin, always look both ways."

{WW]Nayab [Cult of the Valaraukar] May 1 2011 3:46 AM EDT

{WW]Nayab (Alara United) Xenogard (| Xenogard |) $130000 -- Quotes! 3:45 AM EDT

Thats a total of 240k to Xeno thus far o.O

Xenogard [Chaotic Serenity] May 1 2011 4:19 AM EDT

I could do this all day haha.

Unappreciated Misnomer May 1 2011 9:18 AM EDT

I am the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end. I will give unto him that is athirst of the fountain of the water of life freely. (Revelation 21:6). (as seen in fallout3)

the truth is told by those left standing- unknown

war does not determine who is right, only who is left. -unknown

On a long enough time line, the survival rate for everyone drops to 0 -Fight Club

truth and happiness are worlds apart -unkown

god is an imaginary friend for adults -G.Carlin

athirst and unknown shouldbe added to the spell check

Unappreciated Misnomer May 1 2011 9:19 AM EDT

here is another one from a game: Vagrant Story

the body is but a vessel for the soul, a puppet which bends to the soul's tyranny. and lo, the body is not eternal, for it must feed on the fleash of others, lest it returns to the dust whence it came, therefore must the sould deceive, despise, and murder men.

AdminG Beee May 1 2011 9:37 AM EDT

Here's three from Billy Connolly.

I don't know why I should have to learn Algebra... I'm never likely to go there.

My definition of an intellectual is someone who can listen to the William Tell Overture without thinking of the Lone Ranger.

Never trust a man, who when left alone with a tea cosey... Doesn't try it on.

{WW]Nayab [Cult of the Valaraukar] May 1 2011 9:46 AM EDT

Nayab (Alara United) Admin G Beee (BizzyBeee) $52500 -- Quotes! 9:45 AM EDT
Nayab (Alara United) Would you kindly (db) $90000 -- Quotes! 9:44 AM EDT

AdminTal Destra [C and S Forgery Lmtd.] May 1 2011 10:15 AM EDT

The greatest lies of all time:

* I love you
* This won't hurt a bit
* The cheque's in the mail
* I was just going to call you
* I swear I won't come in your mouth
* Of course I'll respect you in the morning
* We have a really challenging assignment for you
* I'm from the government, and I'm here to help you

When a banker jumps out of a window, jump after him -- that's where the money is. -Robespierre-

Join the Army! Travel to exotic, distant lands. Meet exciting, unusual people, and kill them. -Full Metal Jacket-

The dumber people think you are, the more surprised they're going to be when you kill them. -William Clayton-

A raccoon tangled with a 23,000 volt line today. The results blacked out 1400 homes and, of course, one raccoon. -Steel City News-

If God had wanted people to give blow jobs, he wouldn't have given them teeth.

The most common form of marriage proposal:

You can drop a mouse down a thousand-yard mine shaft and, on arriving at the bottom, it gets a slight shock and walks away. A rat would probably be killed, though it can fall safely from the eleventh story of a building, a man is broken, a horse splashes.
-J. B. S. Haldane-,
"On Being the Right Size"

The quickest way to a man's heart is not through the stomach but through his chest, with an axe.

Death is God's way of telling you not to be such a wise guy.

The light at the end of the tunnel is the headlamp of an oncoming train.

100,000 lemmings can't be wrong.

Be creative, invent a perversion.

Blow your mind -- smoke gunpowder.

Dead people are cool.

Keep Sweden tidy, shoot a tourist.

Reality is an illusion caused by lack of alcohol.

Monday is a hard way to spend one-seventh of your life.

Never hit a man with glasses. Hit him with a baseball bat.

Eagles may soar, free and proud, but weasels never get sucked into jet engines.

My parents put us to sleep by tossing us up in the air. Of course, you have to have low ceilings for this method to work.

AdminTal Destra [C and S Forgery Lmtd.] May 1 2011 10:31 AM EDT

We, the unwilling,
led by the unknowing,
are doing the impossible
for the ungrateful.
We have done so much,
for so long,
with so little,
we are now qualified to do anything
with nothing.

Do you think sheep know when you're pulling the wool over their eyes?

It could be worse -- it could be raining.

Schizophrenia beats being alone.

Excuse me, I have to recharge my flamethrower.

FOOT: A device for finding furniture in the dark.

HEALTH: The slowest possible rate of dying.

KARAOKE: A Japanese word meaning tone deaf.

PHILOSOPHY: A study that lets us be unhappy more intelligently.

POVERTY: Having too much month left at the end of the money.

SLEEP: A poor substitute for caffeine.

SLEEP: That fleeting moment just before the alarm goes off.

SUSHI: Known to the rest of the world as 'Bait'.

Research shows that nine out of ten men who try Camel... prefer women.

Old MacDonald had an agricultural real estate tax abatement.

Today is the last day of your life so far.

I'd insult you, but you're not bright enough to notice.

The more things change, the more they suck. -Butt-head-

When I die, I hope to go to Heaven, whatever the Hell that is. -A. Rand-

And out of the chaos, a voice spoke:
"Smile and be happy, for it can always be worse".
And I smiled, and I was happy, and it did get worse.

You don't have to be mad to work here, but it helps.

We are the people our parents warned us about.

Does God believe in people?

The meek shall inherit the Earth - they're too weak to refuse.

Death is the greatest kick of all. That's why they save it for last.

Cancer cures smoking.

Why does free love cost so much?

If it moves, fondle it.

Copulate for coexistence!

To go together is blessed, to come together is divine!

Quyen May 1 2011 11:08 AM EDT

"as we live through, we will find the meaning of life, and at last, God will brainwash us so this cycle could go on.."

"To love other, you have to love yourself. to give things to other, you have to have it yourself. so to troll on others, you gotta know how it feels."

"Whenever they found out something special, they all come up with the same thing thats its genius, but whenever we go 1000 years later, its nothing." <<< shows how time affects people

"As serious people can go, others still call it a joke. whenever its a joke, you have to be serious, as the joke will be untold in a serious call."

"whenever i think of death, i think of hell. whenever i think of life, i think of god. whenever i think of love, i think of how it would feel."

"if i wish that you knew what i meant, i would explain it better"
Johan cruijff

"To know how to do it, you have to explain it, until you wont understand it. then the cycle will go on..."

some things i thought up about life, love, death, and whatever ;)

QBRanger May 1 2011 11:43 AM EDT

Socialist governments traditionally do make a financial mess. They always run out of other people's money. It's quite a characteristic of them.

Margaret Thatcher, in a TV interview for Thames TV This Week on Feb. 5, 1976

QBPit Spawn [Abyssal Specters] May 2 2011 10:58 PM EDT

"May you live in interesting times."
"May you find what you are looking for."
- supposed ancient curses

{WW]Nayab [Cult of the Valaraukar] May 3 2011 2:33 AM EDT

{WW]Nayab (Alara United) QBPit Spawn (Triumvirate) $15000 -- Quotes! 2:30 AM EDT
{WW]Nayab (Alara United) QBRanger (The Funkes) $20000 -- Quotes! 2:30 AM EDT
{WW]Nayab (Alara United) Quyen (Quyen) $100000 -- Quotes! 2:29 AM EDT
{WW]Nayab (Alara United) Tal Destra (Chaotic Endeavors) $550000 -- Quotes! 2:28 AM EDT

Well, biggest prize yet goes to Tal. Maybe i should stop giving him prizes before i got broke ;)
On a side note, this contest will definitely end 12AM server time on Friday May 6 to prevent me from going bankrupt and so i can do the second part of the contest.

Quyen May 3 2011 7:10 AM EDT

May i ask what your next contest be? :O

Duke May 5 2011 9:22 PM EDT

I have a others a bit late.

<Natasha'> only thing i am confident in is that i can beat up the majority of guys in a 1 on 1 fight....
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